The truth is, the more you give to yourself, the more you have to give to others. It's just simple math. You will have more passion to do what you came here to do and set an amazing examples for others too.
What can you do to change this? Here a few tips that come from a woman living within her a deeper connection to feminine power.
- Ask for help. Little bits of help can go a long way to fill up your energy. Ask the kids, your spouse, your co-workers. Other like to be needed it gives them purpose, they learn and grow. We are all in this together.
- Allow yourself to receive. Say yes, thank you, smile and move on graciously. Get into the habit of receiving, it's ok and you deserve it.
- Stop being a martyr or victim. This is not the way of a self cared, high vibrational woman.
- Let it go. Seriously. The control. The worry. The rules. It's just not that important in the long run. But YOUR are.
- Have fun. Let your hair down. Plan something fun and adventurous. HINT: Men love women who can have fun and they need you to be this way. They are naturally in their head all the time, they need you to help them get out of it.
- Exceptional Self Care. Get some now. Pamper, relax and rejuvenate. It can be a day at the spa. Even better is a ongoing daily routine at home. Make it a morning ritual to spend quite time reading, reflecting on your dreams, meditation (super helpful) writing in a journal, exercising, being in nature, feeling grateful, nourishing your body with something green and healthy, lots of hydration, peace and love.
These are inner support methods that will prepare you for the day, give you a grounded or balanced feeling, help you to avoid being an over-giver, feel more confident about your and yes, less over-drawn. The world needs you to show them how to live in harmony. To give is also to receive. It is this love that truly makes the world go around.
With love,
Teresa Salhi
Lifestyle and Success Coach for Women
P.S. Have you seen the Goddess Retreat Virtual Sanctuary? A 9 day virtual retreat designed for giving yourself extreme self care with 9 experts sharing exactly how to avoid being over-drawn and less empowered in your life. You may register now and receive 9 video classes, 9 daily meditations and so much more. You deserve to create a life that supports you better so you can do what you are meant to do and feel good about it. Go here darling .
P.S.S. We love working with new entrepreneurs, women seeking to fulfill a purpose, career changers or any woman who wants to make a positive and profound impact in her life and the lives she touches. This is your time and you deserve to be supported. We can help.
I enjoyed your article and “how-to’s”. I am a FIRM believer in taking care of yourself and that it is in no way selfish, in fact I find it to be the opposite. Like your quote. If I take care of myself I have way more to give to others.
Such great reminders thank you for sharing as I am sure I am not the only one who totally resonated with this on every level as a recovering people pleaser 🙂 xo
I struggle with “let it go.” But, I’m working on it!
Such wonderful and necessary reminders. Thanks for posting. The topic of taking care of ourselves is highly important. And, asking for support is not always easy.
Absolutely Lisa – glad you checked and agree. The more we ask for support the easier it becomes. A step in the right direction….
Before we can take care of others, we need to take care of ourselves. I keep thinking of the air steward’s instructions about oxygen masks – first secure yours and then help others. Many of us have a problem with receiving, as if it’s a sign of weakness. Why not reframe it to be giving someone else the gift of giving?
Yes, so agree! Thanks Vatsala.
i agree with Renee that being willing to receive is a big one. Some how we buy into not being entitled or worthy to receive. Learned my lesson early on to take care of myself first which allows me to be in a better place to help those I can. And, this is so appropos for the season, where supermom and superwoman are out there making the holidays memorable.
Change begins to happen when we are ready to look at ourselves with an honest reflection and then to look at our life – which is the result of what is within. Is it what you want? No, time to make a change…
We must must remember to receive as well. If we can’t find that balance we are of no value to anyone. If we can’t receive I don’t believe that we can properly give either.
If we are not allowing ourselves to receive from family, friends, etc….we are likely not even aware or allowing ourselves to receive the gifts of our Divine Source.
It is so hard to take much-needed time for myself but I have been getting much better at it! I need time at the end of the day to just be and let my mind unwind and I have finally gotten my kids to realize that this is my time! Any homework help needs to be given before 8pm or it’s a no!
It’s great how you are setting boundaries, Mindy. If not you, who? 🙂
True, often we focus too much about how to help others and not asking enough for help for ourselves. 🙂
Yes, for sure but we can change this!
I enjoyed this blog. It is so true. Our culture has taught us to give more and then stop the flow of giving and receiving. We were brought up that taking is not good. Come to think about it, a lot would like to help it is just that they are not being asked.
Yes, so true – it is ok to ask for help and allow ourselves to receive. Thank you for being here Lorii.
Asking is a big deal huh? But my experience is people like to help each other. It makes another happy to lend a hand – why deny this great energy exchange?
Great advice. Exceptional self-care is something that I tend to slack on because I give so much of myself that by the time I get to me, I am super exhausted. Top of my priority now.
Right on top where you need to be girlfriend!
Super reminder… you are so right… we, especially women, are even more troubled with giving to ourselves when we have kids… because they can’t so we must and the guilt is there when we aren’t giving to them, for sure. mine are almost out of the house so I’m trying and getting better. Thanks for the reminders
Time for you Kristen! 🙂
Thank you for writing this, so many women, especially, need to hear it. I believe that if you haven’t received first, you will not have anything to give. So fill yourself up!
Yes ma’am…we can never remind ourselves to much to take care of ourselves.
Great post and share Teresa! I am working on “letting go” not so easy but much better for a more peaceful life 🙂 Giving to ourselves is just as important as giving to others…..we need to make sure we take that time to do that.
Oh, letting go is such a big one. I continue to work on that one too Joan. You can do it darling…
I love your analogy of deposits and withdrawals from a bank. Giving to ourselves is the only way to keep the balance
Yes, let’s keep our life and self care in balance just like we do our bank accounts. The rewards are then on our side.
Wonderful tips, Teresa, and although I am a master of exceptional self care, I could probably stand to have a bit more fun. Funny thing is everyone around me is so used to me ‘doing’ things for others, that when I ask for help, it isn’t always taken seriously. Frustrating to change the conversation on that one. I agree with you that we have to fill up our energy bank and give to ourselves, so that we have lots to give others. But then I’ve also heard that there is always energy to draw on (universal energy), so it is a matter of us getting out of the “I’m drained or tired” mindset and tap into the unlimited energy there for us all. Maybe easier said than done though.
Yes, our mindset is a huge part of our creation. We cannot be asking for help on one hand and believing we cannot get it on another or believing that there is only one way to receive help. Thanks for being here Beverley.
I never really saw myself as one of these, but i am! I try and do too much and then kinda crash. How i would love to join a retreat… one day.
Ah, yes darling. I have something you might like too – an online retreat. Goddess Retreat Virtual Sanctuary- 9 days of video classes from 9 women and one very special man. Taking you on a journey inward, with fun, exercises and support. You can still register and get access to all. .http://bit.ly/2dVfTmt
So true, Teresa, that the more you give to yourself, the more you can give to others. You can’t pour from an empty cup so self care is vital. We need to overcome our tendency to say yes to everything while ignoring our own needs.
yes, yes, yes…..Thanks Tami.
This is a point that needs to be made over and over. We are in such a self-care deficit, we hardly know where to begin. I am in that same boat, and it is still a challenge for me to identify and give myself what I need. Keep on reminding us!
You can do it Reba!!
So very true Teresa–women tend to fall into this pothole. The tip that’s helped me the most is to allow myself to receive. I had to learn this! And it’s still a process. But a life-changing one.
Absolutely Susan. You are on the right path darling…